The Remembrance Tree: Honoring Love, and Healing Through Grace"

 

On the first Sunday of Advent in 2024, the Grief Group Ministry at Mullins United Methodist Church introduced a meaningful tradition: the Remembrance Tree Celebration. I was humbled to speak at this sacred gathering, where we honored the lives of loved ones and friends we lost. 

Grief is a complex journey, often filled with emotions—gratitude and sorrow, peace and regret, joy and longing. Whether our relationships are harmonious or marked by unresolved issues, we carry both the beauty and the burdens of those connections. 

Considering this, I was faced with an important question: How can we celebrate and find peace in a "remembrance tree of celebration" amidst such a range of emotions? I wanted to explore how God’s love and promises allow us to celebrate, heal, and hope, even amid life’s complexities. The following is my response to this relevant question.

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Placing an ornament on the Remembrance Tree carries profound meaning, whether the relationship with our loved one was filled with joy or marked by challenges. Here’s why we can celebrate in both situations:

When the Relationship Was Good

A good relationship leaves a legacy of love, joy, and connection. Placing an ornament on the tree becomes a moment of gratitude for the blessings shared, the lessons learned, and the pleasure experienced. It is a tangible way of saying, “Thank you, God, for the gift of this person in my life.”

Philippians 1:3"I thank my God every time I remember you."

  • This verse reminds us to celebrate the gift of god relationships and their joy in our lives.
  • God's Grace is Bigger than Our Failures: The ornament represents the hope that God’s grace can heal wounds and mend hearts, even when forgiveness wasn’t exchanged before death.
  • Growth Through Challenges: Difficult relationships teach us lessons about ourselves and others, often shaping us in ways we don’t realize.
  • God’s Redemption: Placing the ornament acknowledges that God can bring beauty out of brokenness.
  • This verse teaches us to find hope and growth even in painful situations.
  • In the joy of good relationships, He gives all blessings.
  • In the challenges of complicated relationships, He is the restorer and redeemer of brokenness.
  • The ornament reflects God’s unwavering faithfulness, no matter the nature of the relationship.
  • Gratitude for Good Relationships: A joyful "Thank You" for love shared.
  • Hope for Healing: An act of surrender for unresolved issues.
  • A Declaration of Faith: A reminder that God’s love and grace are sufficient.

The ornament symbolizes the beauty and depth of a relationship that enriched your life. It declares that love endures, even beyond death, and that your loved one’s influence continues to shine like the light on the tree.

When the Relationship Was Difficult

Even in a strained or broken relationship, there is reason to celebrate because:

Romans 5:3-5"Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us."

Placing the ornament becomes an act of surrender—letting go of pain, regret, or bitterness and entrusting the relationship to God’s redemptive power. It symbolizes the belief that God is not done writing the story and that healing is always possible.

Whether the Relationship Was Good or Difficult, We Celebrate God’s Faithfulness

In both cases, we celebrate because God is present through it all:

Lamentations 3:22-23"Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness."

Every ornament on the tree is a testament to God’s love, mercy, and grace. It is a visible reminder that God's hand was at work, whether relationships were smooth or strained, and His faithfulness never wavered.

Placing an ornament on the Tree of Remembrance allows us to honor relationships' beauty and complexity. It’s a celebration of life, love, and the God who holds everything together.

Amen

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